CAn you please review my short story?

Your story is very realistic, which what I ume you were aiming for. The introduction is very good and definately explains the beginning of the story. Perhaps you could label that as "Legend" instead of an introduction That way readers would understand the setting right off. Other questions that come to mind are: Who is Kronos and what does he have to do with this "Power?" Who are the Fates? These are questions that will keep your audience interested. So when and if you continue the story make certain you keep up the mysterious edges with out giving anything away Speaking of audience to what age group are you catering to?